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Ask Your Mama

by Mama Donna Henes, Urban Shaman

Are you cyclically confused? In a ceremonial quandary? Completely clueless? Wonder no more.

*Ask Your Mama™

The What, When, Where, Why, How, and Who of Ceremony & Spirituality

by ©Mama Donna Henes, Urban Shaman

A Question of Lost and Found

Dear Mama Donna,

Hi! I just read your column for the first time, and I have a question. I went through a very traumatic time five years ago and I did some major soul searching. I used to run through my life, now I enjoy all that the universe sends me. I do see "signs" that I recognize and have a uncanny "gut." I still feel that I am on the wrong path and I am wondering, do we loose our way for a reason? I have learned so much over the years, and have different perspective on life. I welcome new things (signs and omens) and have been often heard saying, "Wow, life is sooo cool!"

-Stopping to Smell the Roses in NJ

Dear Rosebud,

It seems to me that you are already right smack dab on your path — The Path to Your Self Discovery. You just don’t recognize it, because your intended destination has changed over the years. Consequently, you think that you are lost. But you are right where you are supposed to be.

You have suffered through a trauma and have recovered. Naturally, this would change your outlook and perspective. Plus, you are five years older with more experience and greater wisdom. Our life path is not set in concrete. As we evolve, the path transforms to meet our new needs. As the Irish say, the path rises up to meet us.

You ask if we lose our way for a reason. Personally, I feel that everything in our lives happens for a reason, although it very well might be not be clear to us at the time. All occurrences — the good, the bad, and the ugly — present us the opportunity to learn a lesson that we need to learn. These karmic tutorial sessions might not be fun, but they are essential for the continued growth and enlightenment of our soul. Ultimately, there is no such thing as bad lesson.

We are pulled away from our original planned direction because we need to make a detour along the way in order to see or hear or learn something important. It seems to me that you have been learning quite a few invaluable life lessons along the trail:

How to recognize signs and omens

How to honor your gut feelings

How to take time to appreciate life

How to glory at the wonder of it all

In my book, that makes you a spiritual savant. These are the most important lessons that life has to teach us. So, feel good about all the progress you have made. And be easy on yourself if you feel there is another path for you to discover and pursue.

Don’t worry. Your path has your name on it — posted large so you can’t miss the turnoff — and it is patiently waiting for you to stumble upon it. All you have to do is keep your heart and your mind open — as well as your eyes and your ears. There are signs and omens everywhere leading you directly to your destiny. Just follow your gut.

And enjoy the roses that line the trail.

xxMama Donna

*Are you cyclically confused? In a ceremonial quandary? Completely clueless? Wonder no more. Send your questions about seasons, cycles, and celebrations to Mama Donna at cityshaman@aol.com


Donna Henes is an internationally renowned urban shaman, ritual expert, award-winning author, popular speaker and workshop leader whose joyful celebrations of celestial events have introduced ancient traditional rituals and contemporary ceremonies to millions of people in more than 100 cities since 1972. She has published four books, a CD, an acclaimed Ezine and writes for The Huffington Post and UPI Religion and Spirituality Forum. Mama Donna, as she is affectionately called, maintains a ceremonial center, spirit shop, ritual practice and consultancy in Exotic Brooklyn, NY where she works with individuals, groups, institutions, municipalities and corporations to create meaningful ceremonies for every imaginable occasion.




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For All Your Ritual Needs : MamaDonnasSpiritShop.com

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