Dear Melissa,

I’m so sorry you are in this situation. Pepper appears to be the more vocal of the dogs. She says you already know the answers to what you’re asking to a large degree. First, the girls are cared for when they are with your ex-husband, but not in the way you would like. It seems like he doesn’t really have things all together, so he is not the best at things like getting them to bed at the right time, brushing teeth, eating good food, etc. He just doesn’t do things the way someone who was more on the ball would. He often relies on other people for help when they are with him. But, the girls are okay when they are there - it’s just not an optimal situation.

As for Pepper and Salt, their care varies. It is similar to the girls in that they don’t get the attention, good food, etc. that you gave them. They sometimes go on walks, but often are just let outside. Sometimes your ex-husband is glad they are there, but sometimes he is resentful of them because they remind him of you. Sometimes he says mean things to them or just shoos them away. They don’t receive the unconditional love and nurturing they did from you, although he does sometimes turn to them when he is lonely. Your ex-husband seems to have a lot of anger in him, and would probably benefit from some sort of counseling.

Yes, Pepper and Salt would love to see you, and they would far prefer to be living with you. The one caveat to that is that Pepper says she wants to be there to watch over the girls when they aren’t with you.

I wish the news was happier, but Pepper says it’s not as bad as you fear. She also says you have a lot to worry about already, so please don’t worry too much about them. They do both miss you very much and want you to know they still love you and always will.

Many Blessings,

Jennifer Dickman