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Vulnerability

by Bonnie Waters


Something I’ve been thinking a lot about lately: where is the appropriate line between the “positive thinking/speaking” focus of teachings like those of Abraham-Hicks and the authentic expression of our thoughts, feelings, and lives? I do understand that if we are always focusing on negative things, we will be creating them in our lives. But what do we do with our less than positive moments of pain, fear, and anxiety? Are we allowed to express the sense of vulnerability that comes with deep and unprecedented change?

We are taught to replace them as quickly as possible with a higher thought and feeling. The premise makes sense, and I do believe that it works, but is that authentic expression? This past year, the effort to do so has been almost constant, as the waves of purging energies seemed relentless for most of 2015. At the same time, people who see the struggles that we go through are perplexed by the response of a smile and “I am well, thank you.”

Sometimes that really is an authentic response, when we’re able to be in the now, knowing that all is well. Sometimes it is “positive reinforcement.” And sometimes, we find that “fake it ‘til you make it” just doesn’t cut it, and are simply left with the need to express a deep vulnerability. Is vulnerability allowed in a person who is working on expanding their consciousness? Is it, in fact, desirable?

One of the most affecting things that I read around the beginning of 2016, was an article by a woman who expressed, in depth and truth, her feeling of “broken-ness” from all that she’d been through last year. It was raw, and real, and deeply revealing of the sense of helplessness in all of the loss she had experienced. She had faced such ego-disintegrating moments that she could hardly believe that she was still here. It took a lot of courage for her to write of this with no barriers, no sugar-coating, no positive spin. It also received more posts than anything else on the site. I could so relate to the vulnerability that she felt. It touched me deeply, and let me know that I am not alone in my own challenging experiences.

We have been forced to let go of huge chunks of our old lives. For many people, this included every area of life: jobs, love relationships, friendships, homes, locations, even, you might say, our identities. We have needed to let go of huge chunks of ego-attachment in the process. The fabric of who we once knew ourselves to be has frayed and unraveled. This is necessary in order to make room for who and what we are becoming. Some people are naturally inclined to let go easily and see that this was the soul agreement that was made for this time on the planet. I know that resistance is counter-productive and only prolongs any suffering involved. The human self still rebels at times.

The year of 2015 was a game-changer! If you sailed through it blissfully, then God bless you! For many that was not the case. The last week of December into January was another emotional wringer with some challenging astrological alignments, and another deep dredging of any remnants of fear. By the end of the first week of January, I felt completely emptied out and so ready for new things to come in. However, Mercury Retrograde slowed things down, and ensured several more weeks of “waiting time” to review and make sure of what I wanted to create, and my new trajectory. It feels that we are now “revving up” towards the eclipses of March. For some, this may finally be the time of creating our wildest dreams for Heaven on Earth. For others, it may mean moving on to more Cosmic creations. Each one has their own path and their own soul expression. 

In the meantime, as we integrate more and more of Soul/Spirit into these human bodies, our human-ness often feels overwhelmed, and seeks some kind of reassurance and stability. And sometimes, we may need to vent something, or express our human emotions, ideally, in ways that are not harmful to others. I can see that as we clear old programming, it is easier to remain in higher-vibrational states, but don’t kick yourself if you are not always there. 

Humanity has passed the tipping point for a 5th dimensional consciousness, and it will get easier to maintain that energy now. This is the Human to Human-Angel conversion. We are coming back to Love, and it’s a process. 

Bonnie Waters is the Lay-Pastor of the Vision of Light Spiritualist Church in Hartland, Vermont, and has been writing in many formats about the Great Shift in Consciousness for several years. She is a mentor for the Awakening/Ascension Process and a songwriter, focusing on new consciousness material. Her contact information is: phone number - 802-299-5083 and email: bonnie_songgarden@hotmail.com



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